Little Miss Independent

This past weekend, we were given some spring weather.  It was wonderful to be able to go outside without having to bundle everyone up.  With the forecast telling us the warmer weather was fleeting (and it is currently 30 degrees outside, so for once, they were correct), we decided to take advantage and go for a walk around the block.  But it was no ordinary stroller walk around the block -- we got out her little red convertible and pushed her around the block.  To say that she was in heaven would be an understatement.

And while I'm sad that we have left her infancy behind (boo to no more newborn squishy snuggles), I am beginning to see how much fun have a toddler is.  She is developing her likes and her dislikes.  She is becoming more independent and wanting to do things for herself.  And she is starting to be able to communicate her wants and needs to us.  I'm trying to work on independent play with her.  Currently, she still feel the need to be with me every single second that I'm home.  Trust me, I do love it, I love the fact that she needs me and she has to have me next to her.  But if I'm really being honest with myself, I'm doing her a disservice by only thinking of how I feel.  I want her to be curious and creative and self-reliant.  I want her to be able to entertain herself.  I want her to develop into a strong, independent woman.  I'm reasonable in my expectations right now.  I am still on the floor with her while she plays, but I try to sit across the room and I disengage in what she is doing, giving her the opportunity to explore her toys by herself.  Most times, she does well for about 5 minutes, sometimes stretches into 10.  Then she comes crawling over to me and we play.  The length of time will stretch and I'm hopeful that she will develop a wild imagination.

 

But she is developing strong appreciations for things as well as aversions to others.  Her taste is developing.  I only offer her what we are eating for dinner.  She doesn't get her own meal.  But there are things that she refuses to eat right now.  I'll continue to give her the opportunity to try these things, hopeful that eventually she will develop a taste for them.  She doesn't like beef at all.  Chicken is iffy.  But the girl does love her pork -- you give her a breakfast sausage and she would eat two of them if you let her.  She doesn't like eggs anymore or green beans.  But she loves all kinds of cheese and blueberries.  Give the girl a blueberry bitten in half and she is a happy camper.

She also doesn't enjoy having anything in her hair.  She pulls out her bows in an instant.  The only way there is photographic proof of bows or headbands is if I can distract her long enough to forget that I put something on her head.

She is in love with Porkchop, her snuggle buddy.  We have four of them (one at daycare, one in the diaper bag, one upstairs and one downstairs.  But it still feels like we don't have enough.  Because they are white and we have too many pets, I am constantly washing them.  But Porkchop is a must during nap time or bedtime.  She likes to rub his satin belly-underside between her fingers while she falls asleep.

She has also developed an independent streak.  She has to do it by herself.  If I pick up her cup for her, she will push it away.  I place the cup on the floor or table and then she will pick it up.  If I put one of her toys in something, a sound of protest will arise and I will pull the toy out.  She has to put it in herself.  Her newest cry of independence is feeding herself with a spoon.  She will still take food off of a spoon that I offer her, but she MUST have her own spoon, so she can feed herself at will.  She also decides when she is done.  If I ask her to stand, she always lets her knees go weak so she slumps to the floor.  Sometimes, she is in the mood for play, but when she is over the game, you know it.

One of her best developments yet is her communication with us.  We now have the primitive point.  She will point to something she wants.  It's quite handy.  Especially when we are standing at the counter and she sees something up there that she wants,  a drink or her bink.  She also points at things that she wants us to notice, like another kid or dog walking across the street or a light in the ceiling at a restaurant.  It has helped with a ton of tantrums that can be appeased by handing her some cheese that I'm eating or a toy that is on the floor if you are holding her.  It's wonderful that she is being to tell us what she wants.

As she grows, it amazes me how quickly she is growing into her own little person.  Soon she will be walking and talking and giving sass.  The days seem to be flying...  Every day, I say to myself "Where did the time go?"

My absolute favorite photo of the day -- a motion shot!

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A Week in the Life (v.8.2)

And this is what my dear Finorah acts like when she is sick.  At the filming of this video, she had her five teeth coming through, double ear infections, and an upper respiratory infection.

She decided that while she was sick, she was also going to teach herself how to eat with a spoon.

 If you read the previous post Adventure's in Murphy's Law, this is the rash that brought on phoning the on-call nurse.

I was totally THAT mom that brought her kid in their jammies to the grocery store at 10:15pm.

This is the rash that developed the next morning.  This is also the photo that I showed to the allergist who helped ease my fears.

So we put our hands up like the ceiling can't hold us...

 We are going to have a Rapunzel on our hands really soon.  Look at that pony!!!!

 We were able to do a fauxhawk and put a pony in the back as well!

Someone is always opposed to get her photo taken with Mama.

I took a night off to have drinks with a friend.  Daddy was in charge and he put her on dog duty!

I'm reading this book Bringing Up Bebe, which is discusses how the French raise their children.  Daddy says that she wasn't acting like a French baby here.

 Somebody is taking inventory for me.

Chompin' on cuteness! 

 A Triptych of a Marvelous Lady Part I

A Triptych of a Marvelous Lady Part II 

A Triptych of a Marvelous Lady Part III

Where's the candy?!?!?

Let me out of here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was gorgeous this weekend and we were able to get out and enjoy it.

Adventures in Murphy's Law

I want you!

Before this past weekend, Finorah has had two teething episodes, breaking a total of three teeth.  During each of the past two teething episodes, she has had double ear infections.  The first was obvious that something was wrong as she spiked a fever.  The second wasn't as obvious.  I brought her into the doctor the following morning after a mid-night scream fest with no fever.  The nurse and doctor looked at me like I was cray cray for bringing her to the doctor a single episode of crying.  Mama's instincts were spot on -- double ear infection.  Both nurse and doctor commented on what a great baby she was despite having two ear infections.  I couldn't understand why she was getting ear infections while teething and didn't think the two were related.  Well, they always say, "The third time is a charm."

I now know that every time my child cuts a tooth, we will have to take her to the doctor's to be treated for an ear infection.  Stories are always best to start at the beginning...  Our story starts on Sunday.  On Sunday afternoon, she began to act fussy (for Finorah), not want to be put down, just wanted to snuggle and sleep all day.  As you saw in the video from the previous post, she was out for the count when she slept, no like sleeping on Sunday.  We all go to bed and she wakes up at midnight after sleeping on her own for the past week.  I told E to bring her in bed with us since she wasn't feeling well.  She fell back asleep, fairly quickly.  Around 1:30am, I woke up to her fussing.  I picked her up to move her and almost recoiled at how hot she was.  I woke E up and asked him to feel her so he knew that I wasn't just exaggerating.  We got out our thermometer and it was reading about 103.6.  We gave her some Tylenol and I sat with her for the hour or so it took to get her back to sleep.  Some of that time was straight screaming, the other time it was just standing and swaying as the minute I sat down, she would begin to scream.  That was all I needed to know and immediately knew that she had an ear infection in each ear.

The next morning, I stayed home with her and got her in to the doctor's.  Her in-office temperature reading was 104.2 and she fell asleep while we waited for the doctor.  She was diagnosed with two ear infections, a sinus infection, and an upper respiratory infection.  We were given a prescription for amoxicillin and told that we should alternate doses of Tylenol and Motrin every four hours until the fever broke and if it hadn't broke in 48 hours, we were to return to the office on Wednesday.  She was given Motrin in the office.  She was happy as a clam once the Motrin kicked in.  E was supposed to leave the next day for Columbus to help a friend for a couple of days.  He wasn't going to go, but I told him that since we had medication, she was going to be better by Tuesday evening and so he should go anyways.  Rule #794:  Never, under any circumstances, proclaim that your kid is going to get better without any hitches just because she did the last time.

So E takes off on Tuesday morning after dropping her off at daycare.  As I'm picking her up from daycare, the lady there says that she has been sleepy all day.  I explained that is her way of saying that she doesn't feel well as she never cries (as long as she is being held, which they do a good job of at daycare, obviously).  She felt warm as I put her in the car and she cranks a little.  As we roll into the house, all holy hell breaks loose.  Rule #290:  Shit will hit the fan the minute that you don't have anyone to help you.

We spent Wednesday, hanging around the house, not feeling good.

I walk into the house with my fevered, cranky girl and notice the dogs look really guilty.  I immediately begin a house inspection to find two tore of bags;  one was the remnants of a 2 lb bag of butterscotch chips and the other was about half pound of chocolate protein shake mix.  The first thing that pops in my head is that now with a sick baby, I'm also going to have to deal with cleaning up after sick dogs (to ruin the end of that story and to make you feel better -- the dogs don't end up getting sick, but it is nagging in the back of mind that that shoe is going to drop for the next 24 hours).  After a dose of Tylenol, our usual nap time was like someone sticking a knife in-between the tines of a fort (does that make you shiver?  Anyone?  Anyone?  Okay, so it's just me...).  She was arching in pain, throwing her head back and stiffening her legs and body.  I couldn't sit down, I couldn't rock her, I couldn't lay down with her.  The only comfortable position was standing up -- so I began about 30 minutes of singing and swaying.  She did fall asleep for a short spell, long enough for me to pick up after the dogs.

She woke up in a better mood, but her face was really red.  She doesn't feel warm anymore, so the fever was respondent to Tylenol which was a good thing in my book.  As we are eating dinner, her face starts to produce this wonderfully red rash.  I was starting to get concerned as I sent a photo to E and he agreed that it didn't look good.  I decided to let the dogs out while she was still happy in her high chair.  Rule #612: Skunks, like plagues, will appear at the worst time.

What the hell is a skunk doing out in freezing Cleveland March?!?!?!?  The poor dogs didn't know what to think as I started going 50 shades of crazy, trying to rush them back inside mid-pee.  The skunk came within 20 yards of the dogs, stuck his tail up, but the dogs didn't see them as they were too busy paying attention to the mad-woman waving her arms and screaming their names.  But the skunk wasn't done yet.  Back inside, the rash was getting worse.  So as I put her in the bath, I called my doctor's office who has an answering service with an on-call nurse 24 hours a day.  Rule #850: Even though your kid has been good for the past two hours, the minute that you get on the phone, she is going to scream.

The nurse was very thorough, but she kept me on the phone for over 30 minutes, because I had to repeat myself multiple times as Finn was screaming too loud and the nurse couldn't understand what I was saying.  She wanted to make sure that Finn wasn't having an allergic reaction to her amoxicillin, but needed to speak to a doctor before telling me to not give the nighttime dose of medication.  She tried to call the hospital that houses our pediatrician for the on-call doctor.  Her intent was to transfer me to the on-call doctor and re-explain my situation.  I was totally dreading another 30 minutes on the phone with the doctor, starting from the beginning, but the fear of what would happen if I did or didn't give her the medication was enough to keep me on the line.  Rule #43: When dealing with operators, always hope for the best, but realize that you are going to get the worst possible outcome.

I think that I'm such a big girl.

According to the operator, there was no on-call doctor at the hospital (!?!?!?!?), so before I could tell her my doctor's office was close (it was 9:30 at night), she transferred me to my doctor -- my doctor's personal cell phone!  My doctor answered in a confused state and when I tried to explain who I was and who transferred me with a screaming baby in the background, she said that she had no idea why they would have me call her.  I was absolutely fed up and wanted to silence my crying baby, so I told her that I could try the operator again and hung up the phone.  I went about calming Finorah and trying to get her to sleep.  I could call back once she was sleeping.  About 15 minutes later, my phone rings from an unknown number.  I don't usually answer my phone if I don't recognize the number, but this time, I figured it must have been important as it was 10pm at night.  It was the on-call nurse who didn't feel comfortable, leaving me with the operator and had followed up on her own.  She spoke with my doctor, via a transfer from the operator like me and explain the situation to her.  They decided that I shouldn't give her the medication tonight, to make an appointment with my doctor for tomorrow (another day of unscheduled time off from work), and to give her a dose of benadryl before bed.  Rule #6: As much as you prepare your medicine cabinet for emergency situations, you will NEVER have everything you need.

It was 10:00pm, I was alone with my girl, and we didn't have any benadryl.  So I bundled her up and off we went to our grocery store, which is thankfully open 24 hours.  We looked a hot-mess.  She was in her jammies, fuzzy boots, her cute jacket & hat, sucking on a bink and wouldn't let go of Porkchop (her snuggle lamb).  I was in bright green sweat pants with a bright yellow t-shirt with a black bra on underneath and no makeup.  Oh, the adventures in motherhood...

The rest of the night went fine, until around midnight.  I bolted upright in bed and thought the skunk was in my room.  In my tired haze, I thought the skunk was inside the house -- it smelled so potent.  I'm not sure exactly what happened, but my whole house, right down to the basement, smelled of skunk for the next two days -- so I think Pepe LePew took revenge on us and sprayed my house.  No other explanation.  Finn woke up at 4:30am and screamed until 6:00am.  As we woke up at around 8:00am, I noticed that the rash on her face was 95% gone.  I lifted up her jammies and saw that she now had red speckles scattered over her torso.  So off to the doctor's, we go.

The doctor said she still had both ear infections and the rash looked like a viral rash -- one that was brought on by her high fever on Sunday and Monday.  She said that the rash might get a little worse, but it should definitely be better after 24 hours.  But then she told me if I had any concerns at all, I shouldn't hesitate to call her and she would start us on different dose of antibiotics and we would chalk the rash up to an allergic reaction.  I gave her the amoxicillin at 1pm that afternoon.  As the evening progressed, she was still crabby and I thought I saw a couple of splotches starting to develop on her face.  By bedtime, there was a definite, but smaller rash on her face -- in different spots than the night before.  I didn't give her the amoxicillin, but gave her benadryl.  She slept better, only waking for about 10 minutes at 4:30am.  Thursday was a big day at work for me -- we had a faculty retreat, which I had responsibilities for.  Rule #201: When you are single-parenting and are absolutely needed at work, your child will undoubtedly wake up and make you question what's more important.

See, Mama, I'm a big drinker and a big girl!

I woke up and rolled over looking at Finn's face.  Nothing there.  Yeah!!!  I went about getting ready to go to work.  Once I was finished, I went into the bedroom and she had rolled over onto her back.  There it was -- THE RASH!  But it was on her tummy now.  The rash that appears on her stomach was different from the scattered speckles from the day before.  This rash resembled the rash that was on her face.  Holy hell.  I sat on the edge of the bed and began a mental battle with myself.  I was needed at work that day and I was totally out of paid-time-off.  I began fervently searching online for images of fever-induced viral rashes and allergic reaction rashes, trying to see which one this rash more resembled.  I also found out that a rash is a side effect of amoxicillin in children -- that it was common for a child to NOT be allergic to the amoxicillin and still have a rash developed.  I took a photo of her tummy and texted Eain.  Then I immediately called him and woke him up to discuss what I should do.  Everything I read said that an allergic reaction would be itchy and she was letting me rub and touch the rash without any reaction.  E, being the herpes virologist, said that it could be roseola (Roseola is caused by one of two strains of herpes -- strain 6 or 7).  Do I give her the amoxicillin and send Benadryl to daycare with her, telling them to watch her carefully?  Do I not give her the amoxicillin and call the doctor later?  I knew the minute that I called the doctor, she would put in her chart that she was allergic to amoxcillin.  Call me crazy, but I didn't want my daughter to have an allergy placed in her chart if I really didn't think that she was allergic.  I also knew that I couldn't keep starting and stopping the amoxicillin -- that she would develop a tolerance to it and then it wouldn't be effective anymore.  E and I discuss what to do for at least 20 minutes, throwing around all sorts of options.

I ended up, giving her the amoxicillin and sending Benadryl to daycare with her, telling the ladies at daycare to watch her for any sign of reaction (spreading of the rash, swelling, etc...).  I also was going to call in later that day, just to check on her.  I went to work and just wasn't feeling like a good mom, leaving her in the hands of someone else, worried that she might be developing some sort of reaction and I wasn't there because I chose work over her.

See the path of destruction that Tornado Finorah brings behind her...

The faculty retreat that I was working had a wide range of doctors in attendance (even my OB-GYN was there -- I wanted to approach him and say hello as he is such a great doctor, but thought it was probably too strange to have him be approached by a patient at a professional event).  One of the ladies that I work with pulled a doctor that she works with aside who is an allergist and asked me to show her the photo of Finn's rash from this morning.  The allergist spoke with me about what she thought it was.  She didn't think it was an allergic rash because Finn didn't seem uncomfortable and the rash wasn't itchy.  She reassured me that even if it was a reaction, Finn wasn't going to have an anaphylactic reaction (which was my worst fear) as that type of reaction usually happens after the first dose, not on the third day.  I was so thankful that I got to speak with the allergist.  I sighed my first sign of relief and relaxed for the first time in over three days.

Last night, E arrived home and Finn was more like her normal self.  She didn't nap, so I couldn't distinguish whether she was cranky because she didn't feel well or because she was tired.  But it was nice to not have to  see a rash develop over the course of the evening and to have the household back to a slight sense of normal.  Her appetite really wasn't there last night and she didn't really drink anything -- I'll have to keep an eye out tonight for that.  I also noticed while holding her, that she had THREE of her teeth cut this week (her two top teeth as well as her fourth bottom tooth).  As someone has commented, "Finn does it big..."  I guess so!

Today (Friday), she doesn't have a rash anymore.  So the doctor was probably correct -- it was a viral rash brought on by her high fever on Sunday.  But the more that I look into E's suggestion that it might be roseola, the more similarities I see.  The only discrepancies that I see in her case is that roseola's rash usually begins on the trunk and spreads to her legs and face.  She did have a very small amount of speckles of rash when her face rash began, but I could easily count the dots of red on that first day.  There is no treatment of roseola and most children recover easily from it.  Either way (fever rash or roseola), I'm hopeful that we have put this sucker behind us.

Stream of Consciousness (The Wishing for Spring edition)

• (All in black was written last week and the blue are the additions from today.) Amazing, amazing, amazing news!!!!  For the past five nights (in a row!!) (Well she got sick over the weekend, causing Mommy to take two days off of work this week and it's only Wednesday.  I'm just trying to get some rest as there has been LOTS of hours-long nonstop screaming sessions causing Mommy to have a couple of Linda-Blair-in-the-Exorcist moments), someone has went to bed around 9pm and woken up past 6am!  In her own crib!!!!!!  The first night, she woke up at 6am.  The last two she has actually woken up beyond 7am.  We are still working out the kinks of the morning.  Right now we are questioning whether we should move her into our bedroom at 6am-ish as her bedroom is adjacent to the bathroom that I get ready in for work and E sleeps in until 7:00am & beyond.  Basically, we are questioning whether she would sleep through my morning routine in the room next to her or if she would sleep better in our room, so E can sleep in longer.  After our one-year check-up last week (which I don't think that I actually told you about), I was afraid that we were in for a battle of wills with a girl that didn't want to sleep all night in her crib.  I was imagining night screaming as we were trying to be strong and keep her in her crib.  I'm knocking on wood here when I say that I think she decided that where she wanted to sleep.  She also decided to cut out her mid-night feeding on her own -- almost immediately after the doctor's appointment (as if she understood the doctor telling me that based on what I was telling her, it was time to stop that feeding).  Once we cut out that feeding and she got over a little cold that she had, she has slept beautifully for us!

• So we are coming down from our birthday craziness.  Life is slowly resuming back to normal and with that, the fading of the constant reminders that I now have a one-year old on my hands.  When do you stop counting the weeks old they are?  Or the months?  I never want to stop counting, but know that it's insane to think that when she turns 10 years old, I'll be saying "Happy 520 weeks old, lady!"  But I have run into a conundrum of sorts.  I have been taking update photos with her every four weeks.  Just me and her.  I did it, so I could see how big she was getting each month.  Because although she is growing up right in front of my very eyes, without those update photos, I wouldn't be able to tell how much she has changed in each month.  I don't see the constant change that is "growing up" as I see her every day.  Those photos have been invaluable to me -- making me realize that things are happening so quickly, that she is growing up so quickly.  I'm not ready to let go of her infancy yet and I feel those photos are part of that.  And so I'll continue with the monthly photos, until I think that it's time to stop. Besides, one of the things that was stressed to me as the "photographer" was to make sure that I get in the photos as well.  I feel that I don't get in the daily photos enough and E doesn't randomly grab the camera to take photos of me and her.  So I have to set up my shots myself and use a remote to capture them.  But I feel like I'm doing her a great service by taking these photos with her.  Everyone wants to see photos of their mama when they were little -- bc I know that I'm not going to look the same when she is 15 (trust me, I'm going to give it a valiant effort, but something you can't stop, like aging).  I know that I wish that I had more photos from my pretty mama when I was young.

• Something else that we have done for Finorah's birthday was to write her a letter.  Surprisingly, E thinks that this is a fantastic idea.  We are each going to write her a handwritten letter on her birthday and seal it in an envelope.  It will be stashed away in her memory chest for her to open at later date in her life.  I'm really excited about these.  I think that on all major milestone birthdays (1,5, 10, etc...) I'm going to ask the grandparents if they would like to write one as well.  E & I are going to sit down and write our letters this weekend.  Signed, sealed, delivered...

• Yesterday was Finorah's first school photos.  Daycare had a photographer come in and take school photos for all those who wanted them.  We dressed her up in her prettiest dress with a faux fur jacket and a pretty headband.  According to my husband, the ladies at daycare swooned over her attire.  When E & I discussed the photo, both of us agreed that she wouldn't smile to a stranger with a camera when I can't even get her to smile.  We had thought that she would give her serious face (like her passport photo or her visit with Santa).  Well, I got her daily report when I picked her up, saying that she gave a beautiful smile for her photo.  I'm very excited to see how they turned out.

• Today I signed us up for "shrimp swimming lessons" at our local YMCA.  The classes start next Thursday and run for 7 weeks.  And her swimsuit just arrived in the mail yesterday -- perfect timing!  I'm looking forward to taking her and seeing her reaction to the water.  She loves the bath and can only assume that she is going to love swimming lessons!  Did I mention her cuteness of a swimsuit?
• Her top left tooth is ALMOST out -- almost.  You can feel that it's right there and you can see white, but it's not out yet.  I just noticed over the weekend that her bottom right fourth tooth is at the same stage as her upper one!  She is going to have five teeth before we know it!

•  I'm still dealing with a sick baby, alone.  Please don't feel sorry for me, as E said that he was going to cancel his plans and I told him to go ahead, thinking that she was going to make a speedy recovery as she always has.  Not this time... :(  This one (& last night in particular) has definitely been an adventure that I'll fill you in on later in the week.

 

A Week in the Life (v.8.1)

Apologies for the absence...  We (the whole family) is fighting some crud.  So photos have taken a bad burner (or a back burner, whatever you choose).

Giving herself kisses in the mirror

Reading books early in the morning

Sleeping with Munk

Early morning narrations by Miss F.

Sunday came and we didn't feel good at all.

She was so over us by the evening -- I made the first available appointment on Monday morning. 

She feel asleep in the doctor's office while waiting for the doctor.

We walked out with 104.2 temp, two ear infections, a sinus infection and an upper respiratory infection.

Poor girl -- she gets sick EVERY time she cuts teeth.

A Week in the Life (v.7.4)

The pastel princess!

Trying to get a one year photo with the teddy bear. Someone had other plans.

These other plans included screaming at Mama from even thinking of lying her next to the bear.

Trying to take some "nice" photos -- lady wasn't having it.

She was having absolutely NONE of it.

Do you think they look the same?

I think they look the same.

Baby cam with a kiss.

The brown warrior.  Check out her boots -- probably one of my favorite pair of shoes she has. (I especially love that one section of hair that is trying to fly away.)

Her first pony tail ever.  Didn't stay in longer than two hours, but it's a start.

Tired mama on a Monday morning with a bed headed girl.

 There is some serious business going on in the mornings with her hair.

 And this is Daddy's attempt at "taming" it.

She is a kissin' fool.

Someone's not happy that it's Monday -- don't worry, sissy.  Mommy's not happy either.

Chapter One: The Beginning

"Safe & Sound" by Matthew West